GO STRAIGHT TO…
(Public-Indecency-Saurus – Quazarian – Racist Squid – Sand Worm – Skrimptingle – Snot-Gobbler – Space Mountie – Squandling – Widdelnaut)
Public-Indecency-Saurus
NORMAN: “And a Public-Indecency-Saurus!”
SAURUS: “(SAUCY ROAR)” – S2 E2 Beastly Behaviour
Dinosaur-like creatures that have a genetic propensity for inappropriate public nudity.
It is thought that this was once a technique to dissuade particularly stuffy predators from eating them through embarrassment.
They are extremely rare creatures with no known home planet or colony, only congregating at big sporting events as potential flash mobs.
They have gained notoriety for being difficult to stop, being similar in size to the extinct brontosaurus of Earth. This might also explain why they hate wearing clothes in the first place, as it takes them an average of 4 days to put on a scarf.
Quazarian
MURPHY: “Look at them all out there! Squandling Battleships… Quazarian Space-Canoes…” – S2 E6 The Murphy Legacy
Famously stubborn aliens.
Just as one might occasionally break the law if they consider the results harmless, Quazarians have been known to defy the laws of physics when they are being a bit of a nuisance.
Humanity refers to this flagrant disregard for the fundamental laws of the Universe as ‘Jaywalking over Newton’.
This has led to Quazarians impossibly achieving space travel using wood as their primary construction material, as well as occasionally speeding up the passage of light when they have a doctor’s appointment to get to.
Racist Squid
HAMISH: “Tha’ll be Cephalobob, the Racially-Sensitive Squid. (WHISPERS) Bob used to be a rrracist squid-“
NORMAN: “YES, I think I got that, thanks.” – S2 E2 Beastly Behaviour
One of the few species in the Universe where the name really says it all.
The ink they spew when on a tirade is useless at concealing them from predators but is very effective at obscuring the truth, which is why it is so good for writing small print.
Sand Worm
YUG: “Without Ms. Teller, we have no knowledge of the desert’s dangers.”
OORT: “PROBABLY SAND WORMS.”
NORMAN: “It’s ALWAYS sand worms!” – S2 E3 Wisdom & Widdelnauts
It is a known fact of the Universe that no matter how far-flung the desert or how bizarre the life-forms get, there will ALWAYS be Sand Worms.
These impossibly large worms somehow sustain themselves on whatever they can find while burrowing in the sand, even if that’s just other Sand Worms.
Taking advantage of being so prevalent, the Sand Worms have taken to taxiing other species around deserts. They have exceptional tremor senses, a safe stomach area and reasonable hourly rates.
Small talk is limited to gargantuan roaring.
Skrimptingle
RHO: “Skrimptingles are worse. When asked if they go forward or backward through time, they just say ‘up and to the left a bit’.”
NORMAN: “As far as we know, they only exist on Wednesdays.” – S2 E6 The Murphy Legacy
An alien species functioning on a completely different timeline.
Skrimptingles have taken to wearing socks with days of the week written on them to help them in dealing with more chronologically aligned species.
Snot-Gobbler
YUG: “What was my signal, again?”
RHO: “(SHOCK) SON OF A SNOT-GOBBLER!”
YUG: “That is an unusual signal.” – S2 E4 Mind Heist
Curiously, a species that has nothing to do with snot.
Once called Conkzors, this species of entirely pleasant aliens had their name changed in an attempt to dissuade potential tourists. After noting the infamy of the Gas-Guzzler species, they went with ‘Snot-Gobblers’ to maintain the rural aesthetic of their planet.
Unfortunately, as their planet still consists of cheese valleys and wine volcanoes, it has had little effect.
Space Mountie
RHO: “No more Space Mounties!”
MURPHY: “From Space Canada?! They were the WORST.” – S2 E1 Scum of the Universe
Canada jettisoned itself into space around the time of ‘World War 3 – Scandinavia’s Revenge’.
The floating country is now a traveling bastion to aliens of all sorts.
With particularly wide space helmets to accomodate their hats and facial hair (men, women and gender-less alike), Space Mounties soar the cosmos seeking to tame the wilderness of space. Their preferred mounts are Hover-Horses, but Space Mounties are capable of riding ANYTHING in an emergency. It is said they can wrap their moustaches in their mount’s hair to perform a mind-link with them.
Others say that is ‘the stupidest poppycock they’ve ever heard’ from some old billion-dollar 3D franchise.
Space Mounties, like all Space Canadians, are exceedingly polite, which only adds to their renown. If someone has the guts to queue for their turn in the middle of a brawl, they must be confident.
Squandling
MURPHY: “Though I wouldn’t trust a Squandling with my money. And obviously Gorrians shouldn’t be allowed passports. And I don’t believe in Gravity.” – S2 E4 Mind Heist
It is a Universal rule that at some point in every being’s short lifespan, it will be owed money by a Squandling.
Nobody likes Squandlings.
Widdelnaut
MURPHY: “Rho, there’s a furry little thing over there!!”
RHO: “That’s a Widdelnaut.”
MURPHY: “Let’s approach, Rho. And remember, be discreet… OOOO, OO-CHEE-GOOOO!!! AREN’T YOU PRECIOUS?!”
Adorable, furry aliens from Planet Widdel, most recently known as ‘Planet Sponsored by Flavoured Fingernails™: The Delicious Dish on your Digits!’
Planet Widdel is their home planet, but Widdelnauts have made a name for themselves across the Universe for being so darned cute. They do exceptionally well in advertising with their soft Southern drawl and adorable, fuzzy bodies, which is why they often have a planet-wide sponsorship deal on the go.
Oddly enough, Widdelnaut babies are said to be exceedingly ugly. Scientists say this is a biological trick to make sure that their parents are truly committed.
Many Widdelnauts will make a pilgrimage to visit their spiritual leader, Wise Steve, which involves taking on many trials for just a sample of his laconic, folksy wisdom.
Astral Mermaid to Gazborian (S2)
Gorrian Meatgrinder to Palindrone (S2)
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